Dear Reader,

Awww, don’t cry.
I know you’re upset that Scarlett Johansson is going to marry Ryan Reynolds, but it’s set. There’s nothing you can do now.

Yeah, it’s a big shame that she is marrying him and not you.
I know you two were perfect for each other.
I mean, how many nights did you spend planning the perfect wedding, where both of you would live happily ever after?

The flowers, the people, the horse drawn carriage, the beautiful cake, even the restraining order.

Well……Get over it!
You never had a chance with her anyway.
I mean what part of no closer than 100 feet don’t you understand?

Yeah, I know that you painted that mural of her on your bedroom celling, but it may be time for you to cover that up with the Def Leopard poster you still have in your closet.

I’m sure you’re even asking yourself right now, what’s he got that I don’t?
Well a career, for starters. Oh, and he’s not still living in his mom’s basement.
But, mainly I think it’s those washboard abs of his.

Yeah, I know this is hard for you, but buck up there little man.
Before you know it, life will present you with another celebrataunt that you have no chance with either.

Just keep watching, and don’t lose hope.