Here is my authoritative review of the NBC television show “Heroes.”
It sucks.
No, I haven’t seen it, but that doesn’t mean I can’t review it and know that it sucks.

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Nerds all over nerddom have a reason to feel a little better after last week’s revelation that soft-core, pop artist, Moby had dated Queen Amidala herself, Natalie Portman.
It seems that Scarlett Johansson is going up for sale. On eBay!!!
(Not that any true nerd could afford her having spent all the cash he doesn’t spend on […]

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Everyone’s favorite perv, Woody Allen, is set to realize one of his (and frankly most men’s) fantasies in his next film entitled, Vicky Cristina Barcelona where there will be a lesbian sex scene between Penelope Cruz, and Allen’s not so secret crush, Scarlett Johansson.

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Dear Reader,
Awww, don’t cry.
I know you’re upset that Scarlett Johansson is going to marry Ryan Reynolds, but it’s set. There’s nothing you can do now.

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