Exposure to Tom Cruise may include the following: dizziness, anxiety, delirium, nausea, inability to sleep, irritability, homosexual thoughts, and suicidal behavior.
Use extreme discretion, and by any means do not operate a vehicle or heavy equipment for up to 8 hours after exposure to Tom Cruise.

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Yes, that’s right.
To be the wife of the largest closet case in America, you have to be an A or B-lister, and still have to audition.
Katie Holmes was one of several starlets including Jennifer Garner, Scarlett Johansson and Jessica Alba, to be considered to even audition for the role of Tom Cruise’s “wife.”

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The robot slave of Tom Cruise and her fashion programmer mentor, Victoria Beckham, have had a bit of a falling out lately.
Formerly BFF’s forever, Katie and “Posh” have been seeing very little of one another after Katie referred to “Posh’s” tattoos as “trashy.”
(The Horror!)

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Showing the truest form of love and loyalty that Hollywood can muster, Nancy Cartwright, the voice of a one, Mr. Bartholomew J. Simpson, donated $10 million dollars to the Church (chuckle!) of Scientology last year!

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First off, I just want to congratulate Tom Cruise on being so committed to a cause, a belief, that he was willing to sacrifice logic, reason, and most importantly, sanity in order to devote his life to something that is greater than him.

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